If you’re the lest bit confused about what’s going on with me this will help you understand.
There are three levels of cognitive functions that control our Behavior.
i.e., skill based level, rule based level, and knowledge based level.
Skill based level doesn’t take a conscious effort. It’s handled in our subconscious. We know exactly what we are doing. So we subconsciously act, or behave.
Rule based level is some what conscious. We have standard rules on how we handle the situations. So we draw from our rules that handled situations in the past.
Knowledge based level is I don’t know what I’m looking at, but in this other situation I handled it this way. So that’s how we behave. It takes a full consciousness effort, and many time we mess up.
The past nine years I’ve been stuck in almost full knowledge based level. So much that my brain hurts all the time. When I try to relax and slip into subconscious mode I’m disrupted by any means possible.
My skill based level is fully disrupted. All my skills that make me an awesome employee get totally disrupted. I’m a great negotiator. I’m a good leader, and motivator, but I don’t get to use the skills. It makes me very angry.
My rule based level is halfway disrupted. I’m a principaled person. I have rules for so much. What hurts the most is I’m forced to break them. It makes me angry when their disrupted.
Also theirs a none stop disruption of my belief system. Do to everything being so deferent then me. Almost every one forced the ideologies on to me.
All this combined with so much more has me in very bad shape, and over compensating for bad Behavior.